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Why Some Neurodivergent Children Mask or Camouflage

  • 5 hours ago
  • 2 min read

Discover why some neurodivergent children mask or camouflage their differences and why it matters.


Many parents and carers tell us:


"They're fine at school but completely exhausted at home."


This can sometimes be explained by something known as masking or camouflaging in neurodivergent young people.



Young girl feeling anxious and tired after school


 

What Is Masking and Camouflaging in Neurodivergent Young People?


Masking involves concealing or suppressing aspects of yourself that may be associated with neurodivergence. The aim is often to avoid standing out or being judged.


Camouflaging is generally considered the wider set of strategies someone uses to navigate social situations. It includes masking but also involves actively learning and applying strategies to compensate for social or communication differences.


This might include:

  • forcing eye contact

  • copying classmates

  • hiding sensory discomfort

  • suppressing stimming

  • rehearsing conversations

  • pretending they understand when they don't

  • continually compensating and adapting behaviour to fit social expectations

 

Why Does This Happen?


A child may do this to:

  • fit in

  • avoid bullying

  • make friends

  • avoid standing out

  • feel accepted.

 

Although these strategies may help children navigate certain situations, it often comes at a cost.

 

The Hidden Impact

Research links masking with:

  • exhaustion

  • burnout

  • anxiety

  • reduced wellbeing

  • increased risk of depression.


Parents and carers may notice emotional outbursts after school, increased fatigue or withdrawal at home.

 

What Can Parents and Carers Do?


Create spaces where your child doesn't have to pretend.


Accept their preferred ways of communicating and regulating themselves, whether that's movement, sensory supports, quiet time or pursuing special interests.


Normalise and talk about differences in an affirming way, whilst also acknowledging the challenges that can come with a neurodivergence.


Support your child to connect with others with a similar ways of thinking and experiencing the world.


Talk to SENCOs to ensure reasonable adjustments are in place to ensure that demands placed upon your child during the school day do not negatively impact on your child.



Final Thoughts

Feeling accepted can reduce the need to mask and support better mental wellbeing.


Children thrive when they feel safe to be themselves, not when they feel they have to hide who they are.



If you're wondering whether your child would benefit from additional support or an assessment, our multidisciplinary team at bMindful Psychology is here to help.





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